I had the opportunity of addressing the finalists of the Femina Miss India Pageant. I was supposed to speak on my cancer journey and inspire the girls. In all my talks about my cancer journey, I start with – Cancer was the best thing that happened to me! Cancer for me was a springboard for personal development. I would not have made significant changes to my life if I had not gone through the experience. I looked at cancer as a blessing. We look at cancer as a monster, as an enemy, to fight against. Whom are we really fighting – our own bodies? Yes, while we are going through the radiation and the chemotherapy, we may not be able to see the beauty of the illness. But Cancer, like any other illness, can actually be a beautiful journey of self-discovery.
And today I am part of a community where we call ourselves Cancer Thrivers. There are 3 categories in which a person going through cancer, can be in.
Victim
A victim asks - Why me? What did I do to deserve this? Why do bad things happen to me? A victim does not take responsibility for his/ her life. They five their power away. They live of others’ terms – the doctors, caregivers, extended family etc. They somehow cope with a subnormal life and never really recover from the adversity.
Survivor
A survivor fights the fight well. Survivors rely on their courage, determination, hope and optimism. They go through the treatment and put the distressing episode behind them, clawing back to a semblance of the ‘old normal’. They look at cancer as a random and unfortunate incident, as a bump in the road.
Thriver
Thrivers view Cancer as a ‘fork in the road’: that can point in a new direction to help them move away from the comforting but stifling notions of normalcy in life. This fork takes thrivers towards growth and transformation. Thrivers don’t five in to self pity or go to war with their own bodies. They honour the cancer and reclaim their life. For them each day is an attempt to be a better version of themselves. They actively create and embrace the “new normal. And given their experience and learning, they then serve others.
After this, I shared some of my daily practices I indulge in for my wellbeing – physical, mental, emotional, relational and spiritual (existential not religious). And when I asked them to share if they had any regular practices, it was heartwarming to know that each of them had more than one practice. Playing with their pets, going for walks/ treks/ hikes, listening to music, spending time with their families (especially mom), tending to their plants, doing meditation, reading, cycling, swimming,…….. the list goes on and on. It was a heart warming experience being with this group of young, energetic and ambitious women.
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