I decide I will go for a walk daily. After getting out of my comfort zone and making the effort, I stop going for walks. There’s always something to do in the time I save by not going for the walk.
I decide I will stop not eating my daily samosa with my evening tea. For some days I manage to do so. Every day I see my colleagues eating the samosa at tea time. After a couple of weeks, I am back to my old habit.
I decide to shorten my lunch breaks by not gossiping with my colleagues. And I make the effort to leave the lunch room as soon as I have finished eating. This goes on for several weeks. My colleagues continue to linger after lunch to chat. After a month, I find myself staying back after having my lunch to listen to the grapevine*1.
What stops us from keeping our commitments? We decide on something and then new get waylaid. We get tempted from the outside environment to do just the opposite. Why are we unable to be consistent in our efforts? What’s our favourite excuse?
We do not have a “compelling reason”. This compelling reason helps when we are most tempted. It helps us to easily do what we have decided on. It makes us transition to the change happily without feeling that our freedom is being curbed. This compelling reason helps to make the shift in our mindset. It brings us joy. It gives us a feeling of fulfilment.
Start with any reason. And gradually refine the reason to make it more compelling. Let the reason start as a sapling. Slowly and surely. nurture the reason till it becomes a tree with strong roots. And once to find that compelling reason, marinate in it. Make it part of your personality.
Manish (52 years old) wanted to lose weight. He started with the reason of attracting the attention of the girls. Soon that was not motivating enough. His reason evolved to being healthy – having an energetic body and clear mind. Then he further refined his reason to be an inspiration for people in their fifties. After seeing many of his family members struggle with various health issues in their old age, now his reason is that he wants to have a functional body when her is older say in his eighties. This for him is his compelling reason.*2
Note: *1 Under certain circumstances, listening to the grapevine maybe be helpful to navigate office politics.
*2 Note that different people will have different compelling reasons given their temperament, their values, their experiences, their beliefs. Eg. In journey to having a healthy body, someone else’s highest compelling reason may have been to be an inspiration for others.
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